Relationship Quotes & Advice
Things You Shouldn’t Do When Trying To Win Your Ex Back
Some relationships take a bit longer to get back than others, but most of the time, men are able to get their girlfriend back within anywhere from a couple of days to a couple of weeks. Of course, this isn’t always the case if his ex-girlfriend has already moved on or if they’ve broken up several times before. So, depending on the severity of your breakup, you can expect to get your ex back within the next 24 hours, week, a couple of weeks or in extreme cases, a couple of months. How quickly you win her back really depends on how dedicated you are to refrain from making all the classic mistakes and start doing what actually works. An ex recovery plan has to be well thought out and you don’t want to be making a ton of errors while trying to win back the person you care about. Here are 5 things you shouldn’t be doing when trying to win your ex back!
Common Mistakes When Trying To Win Back Your Ex
1. Never Get Down On Yourself – It can be easy to get down on ourselves after a breakup. The last thing you want to do is compound things – making them worse for your ex to feel attracted to you again. However, your ex probably won’t be attracted to someone who is acting depressed and feeling bad for themselves all the time. Negativity and sour moods can suck all of the positive vibes right out of you or whatever connection you are trying to form with your ex. Your ex, whether they realize it or not, is naturally attracted to a person who makes them feel good to be around. So, leverage that anytime you get a chance.
2. Not Using The No Contact Rule Properly – Lots of people choose to use the No Contact rule after splitting up. What they don’t realize is that there are several elements to this rule. It’s not just a matter of if and when you should do it, but you need to understand how it works and how all of the no contact puzzle pieces fit together. A quick internet search about the No Contact rule basically suggests not contacting your ex for anywhere from 20 to 60 days after the breakup. If your ex doesn’t come running back, then it wasn’t meant to be and you should just move on. Some people will also tell you to wait another 30 days before contacting her again and if she’s not interested, just move on. Crazy, isn’t it? The No Contact rule is one of the most misunderstood pieces of advice that you will find online when it comes to getting an ex back. Overall, the No Contact Rule usually works for women who want to get a man back, but if you are a man who wants to get a woman back, it will almost certainly be a very bad move on your part.
3. Stop Yourself From Rushing To Judgement – Following a breakup, one of the biggest mistakes we can make is rushing to judge. You may say to your ex that he or she is the worse person you have ever come to know. All of this pent up anger and resentment may come pouring out of you and you may quickly arrive at the belief they are to blame for everything. Consequently, if you have puffed up notions of how everything is their fault and you did nothing wrong, you will just disillusion your ex and set things back even more. You can also harm your chances of getting your ex back by giving up to soon or thinking your chances are doomed. So, rushing to a conclusion about anything, particularly immediately following the breakup is almost always a slippery slope. It’s best to allow for some time and space to bring things back into balance. When emotions run high, logic runs low. With that in mind, slow things down.
4. Don’t Beg Or Plead For Another Chance – When a man or woman gets dumped by someone they love, it can as though their entire world is crashing down and they are being left with nothing to live for. It can be a horrible experience to go through and because of how painful it is, most people make the mistake of begging and pleading for another chance. This can be a huge turnoff because we want partners who are emotionally strong. This is especially true for women, as they see begging and pleading being a weakness. It displays low confidence, emotional independence and insecurity. Don’t worry if you’ve already made the mistake of pleading, because it is something that a woman can forgive. The secret during a breakup is to accept your exes reasons for breaking up with you and then leave for a few days to fix and improve yourself. Not being in contact for 2-3 days shows the person that you respect and appreciate them, but more importantly – that you have the capacity to learn from mistakes and then improve from them.
5. Failing To Enhance Your Value – One thing you should be doing while the two of you are separated is working toward increasing or reinforcing your value in the eyes of your ex. For them to miss you, not only can they not have access to you, but they also need to see all of your wonderful qualities along with some new ones too. That means you need to focus on being the best version of you that you possibly can. Use social media and your friends to demonstrate how you are getting on with the world.
